A little help.......

So I know that it has been forever since I have written a post.  I am not really sure why.  It partially has to do with the fact that I have been really busy lately, but it may also have to do with the fact that I really haven't felt like writing much.

This is the busiest time of the year for my department at work, so a lot of times when I get home, I just want to pour myself a glass of wine or open an beer and just sit and be still and quiet.   Looking at multiple computer monitors and talking on the phone all day long can be draining.  Plus I have been having to do two jobs since the beginning of July.  Long story that I don't want to get into right now.

But today while I was reading a message from a friend who is going through the same journey as me, it made me think about all of the other people that I know that are struggling with the end of a marriage, a divorce and then starting the process of getting back in the saddle so to speak.

And it made me realize that there are people out there just like me.  They have been there and they have done that.   They have gone through it or are going through it now.  

I felt honored that my friend was asking my opinion.  She wanted to know my thoughts and she wanted a little insight.   And I was glad that I was able to tell her what I think.  Now, I am no therapist nor do I claim to have all of the answers.  But I can and did give a little insight.  I can say that it gets better.  I can say that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  And I can say that you can and will find love again.  

So as my journey continues I want to leave you with this:

You never know what someone else is thinking or going through.  Don't be afraid to reach out.  Don't be afraid to offer advice or help.  But most importantly, don't forget to ask.   You never know.  Someone else may be or has gone through the same thing and maybe able to help.  

Time Flies When You are Having Fun

So I can't believe that it is June.  And I know, it has been over a month since I last posted an entry.  Life has been a little busy.  Plus every time I sit down to write, I can't think of anything to say.  Call it writers block, call it I have too much stuff going through my head right now that I don't know what to say, call it being lazy, or you call it I just haven't wanted to share it yet.  I will let you pick.

So in the past month, I have seen a broadway play, gone to baseball games (both professional - well minor leagues-  and college), had a few dinners out, went to the beach, went to the movies, went to a party, saw a friend get installed as a pastor, volunteered, and welcomed a friend's baby into the world (make that two babies).

No wonder I haven't written anything.  Plus most of the time that I usually spend writing, I have been spending either praying or thinking.  Mainly while enjoying a glass wine on my patio.  The weather has been beautiful lately and I have been taking advantage of the quiet patio.   Just like now, I am sitting listening to the birds chirp (at laughing at Calvin as he sits in the window sill and meows at the birds).  I think that the birds are taunting him.

I have been thinking a lot about my future and what I want that to look like.   I have been thinking about who I want to be in my life and what kind of lifestyle do I want.

I have been thinking about what true love actually is.

For now, I am going to keep a lot of the details to myself.  But I promise to share any exciting news or changes in my life when the time comes.

Until then, I encourage you to take some time out of your busy day and just be still.  You will be amazed what you can learn in the quiet and stillness.

April Showers Bring May Flowers....

Or after this past weekend, it should be Cinco de Mayo storms with high winds and hail, bring a mess in the back yard and wet sofa cushions.  But at least I enjoyed my margaritas.

So April was a month that was full of all kinds of emotions and life events.    It was a time of change, reflection, rejoicing, celebrating, forgiving, and realizations.   But most importantly, the end of the month and the beginning of a new one has brought about a fresh start.

During the month of April, I learned an important lesson about love.   Love can be scary and love can make you scared.  Love can make you second guess.  It can cause, what you think to be doubt, fear, and disbelief.   It can cause you to make mountains out of mole hills.    It can make you wonder if you are doing the right thing.   It can make you feel like you have to run far, far away.    Love can make you do stupid things and make mistakes.

But most importantly, love can make you rethink change.  It can make you look at the big picture.  It can make you have the tough conversations.  It can make you understand.   It can help you realize the truth.  And it can help make you ask for forgiveness.   It can make you confront the truth.

Love can work the way that it is supposed to.  You just have to allow it to do its job.

So as I look out on the blooming rose bushes and other flowers in my front yard, I can think about the beauty of a fresh start.   Just as the rose buds are opening and spreading lots of color in the flower bed, there is something new opening up in my heart.

And I want to try really hard to figure out what that something is and what it all means.

Serving Others through Mentoring

So as many of you know, as part of my employment, I am required to volunteer 40 hours a year.   That time can be completed during working hours or outside of hours.   At the end of last year, I was challenged by my manager to find an area that I was passionate about and strive to focus my volunteer time with my passion.   So I thought about about it and came up with my passion being helping children.

So since January, I have spent a hour every Monday with this precious 9 year old girl that lives in one of Raleigh's public housing complexes.   Sky (that's not her real name, but I will call her that), has been having problems in school with her reading skills and was selected to be a part of the mentoring program through the local YMCA.

So twice a week Sky attends a mentoring session and each session lasts an hour.    And one of those hours/sessions was with me.   Every Monday, I went and met with her and we worked on her reading, writing, spelling, comprehension and other language arts skills.

However, I think that there were times that I learned just about as much as she did.   She reminded me every week how much I take for granted about what I have and the home life that I had growing up.   I had a nice house to live in, full meals to eat, my own room and two loving parents.  I was particularly blessed with a mom who was a teacher and would take time to work with me on my school work.   Sky doesn't have that opportunity, but now she has had me in her life.  And I feel blessed to be a part of hers.  

I forget sometimes how my life experiences have shaped me and sometimes I amazed her when I just talk about some of the events that have happened in my life and things that I have experienced.   And I'm not talking about big events, just small things.   One week, she got so excited to hear that I had a car and owned a house.    She insisted on seeing my car after our session.   Then one week, I mentioned that I went to the zoo over the weekend and he insisted that I show her the pictures that I took.   But then she told me that it was sad that I didn't have any children, because she thinks that I would be a great mom.   I told her not be sad, but that one day I would.

After Monday afternoon, I so looked forward to our time together each week.  I meet with her at a local church that is located behind the housing complex.   She would walk over after the school bus has dropped her off and we get to work.  We usually chatted for a few minutes about her day and weekend while she enjoyed a healthy snack.

My favorite time of the hour is game time.   If she had done a good job and had stayed focus, I was allowed to play a game with her.  The games were sometimes pre-determined and had some educational value.  But sometimes they were just fun.   One week we played Connect 4 and she beat me.   But that's okay, I got revenge the next week when we played Scrabble (thanks Words with Friends for all of the practice).

But as always all good things sometimes come to an end.   And last week was my last visit with her.    With the upcoming end of the school year, the mentoring program is now on break for the summer.   At the year end banquet that was held last week, Sky, presented me with a picture of the two of us that was taken during one of our sessions.  I have placed it on my desk at work and I smile every time I look at it.  She also asked me if I would be her mentor in the fall.   It made me cry.

So until the fall.  I can't wait to see what other opportunities I may get to encounter and I hope that Sky continues to grow in her education.

Tyler Zeller and The Summit Church

So I know that a few of you are really interested in seeing the interview between my pastor, J.D. Greear and Tyler Zeller.  The first part of the video is the interview and the the second part is a question and answer session that was held about our current sermon series on the Holy Spirit.

I hope that you enjoy.




P.S. --- For all you DOOK fans, you may want to pay particular attention to the part after J.D. prays for Tyler as he exits the stage.  That one is for you.